The Complexity which is Me

Had an interesting conversation tonite.
What was supposed to be a get to know each other session
Turned out to be a revelation of my subconscious self.

As the conversation went,
Thoughts of my subconscious flooded over to my consciousness.
And as I sit and ponder those thoughts,
I came to realization that the reason that I am unable to be fully understood,
Was not the fact that I didnt let anyone near my dreaded fears;
nor was it others have not tried hard enough to understand me.

The REAL reason of my solitude was....
the inner complexities within me which makes others hard to comprehend and digest.
This leads to my solitude,
And as I curse the world for not being able to understand me,
It was me who is far to complex too be understood.
And though I try to mask this by reiterating the notion of simplicity within me,
I have come to realise is I AM FAR TOO COMPLEX A PERSON TO BE UNDERSTOOD to begin with....

Took me this long to realise this.

Others are unable to relate, thats a fact,
And I pray that one eventually will.
Till then, I will try my very best to untangle myself from this complexity which
I have weaved and knotted myself in.

That time of the year again....

Yes, its that time again for me...
The annual affair where I celebrate the beginings of my existence
Yes, Its my birthday!

Happy Birthday to me!

Conventionally I always kept my birthday to myself.
Well, its not anything anti social. Just that I treat it as a "Me" day.
A day where I just do what I wanted to do without anyone influencing me.
And despite popular believe, I am pretty introverted to some sense.
I dont share my past and feelings much with others.
Only a select few have that access.

But with the recent changes / transformation I faced the past few months,
I think that its time for the change.

Guess. for this year.. I will open up a lil.
So, here goes, 11 things few know about me (until now):

1. I bungie jumped and loved it. (Took 2 days to wipe that smirk off my face!)
   
2. I broke my right arm when I was 7 yrs old. (Was trying to impress a girl while swinging on monkey bars at the playground)
3. I was bitten by my neighbor's female dog on my face when I was 8 yrs old. (People tease me that my first kiss was from a bitch!)
4. I love to jog (helps me focus on my thoughts)
5. I once lost a dare and ate the most disgusting thing to date... Balut (Duck Embrios), from the Philipines. Yucks! (Its like 10 times the taste of roasted Duck Butt!, Don't ask about the Duck Butt...)
   
6. Standing beside animals(especially fish) bigger than me freaks me out. (I freaked out standing beside a giant Garupa once and it still freaks me out! :S )
7. My first pet was a mongrel I rescued from the drain behind my house. (To date, I still think Browny was my best pet eva!)
8. My record of over stuffing myself was 16 slices of pizzas and 7 pepsis. (Hey, it was a dare and Pizza Hut was having all-you-can-eat-and-drink). Second was 6 Wan Tan Noodles + 3 drinks + 1 extra bowl of Wan Tan. Third was 16 scoopes of Hagen Daaz Ice Cream (Yes, it was an all-you-can-eat affair)
9. I am a sucker for Sci Fi movies (even the Z grade stuff)
10. I am a sucker for Paddle Pop Rainbow Ice Cream. (Makes me feel like a kid all over again. :P
11. I fancy things which are Green. (Subconsciously, I have a tendency to choose green for the things I like).
    

There. Hope this is a good start to more good changes to come!!!

Cheers!

~Lens~

Inspiring thougts by Bertrand Piccard